#3 Hold your peace

Breaking up poses many questions:

Did you love me at all?

How could you think about losing me?

Am I not worth fighting for?

Yeah, you get the drama.

All these questions multiply and intensify once you ex finds a new partner before you do. Especially if you personally haven’t moved on.

Last week, I was planning on meeting Matty to talk. In fact, we’ve already made initial arrangements but we didn’t have a final schedule yet. He agreed to meet me either on a Friday night after work (yes, another midnight-to-morning sacrifice), or on a Saturday night. I didn’t bother asking him whether he’d keep it a secret from his new girl or not. I just wanted all my questions answered.

I drafted all my Qs as to be prepared should he suddenly call for our meet-up. But the days went by and I started to doubt whether it was the right thing to do. One night I randomly searched for articles online about relationships and breaking up, until I got the answer I needed.

I decided; I told him I didn’t need to do “the talk” anymore. Hi didn’t reply.

Up to now I’m clueless on whether he read my message or not, or if he cared at all. But I should be firm with my decision. No communication, no stalking, and if possible, no lingering thoughts about him.

If you can’t do that, how can you move on?

Moving on step #3: Leave the questions unanswered and build a new truth for yourself.